Happy Healthy Me

I’ve had colds since February. It was on and off. Panadol will ease me for two or three days and it goes back to me like a very clingy ex-lover, desperate for attention and some cuddling under the sheets. It’s so frustrating now. I’ve had runny nose every morning and the chills kept coming back. AC is adding up to my anxieties because I can’t seem to fully control the temperature at work and in the flat. I’ve been wearing casual jeans and jacket cause I really can’t afford to be in corporate dresses, blouses and skirts.

Sam made me a fruit and vegetable smoothie last night which I brought to work. I also insisted we buy Vitamin C for me so we did – even last minute he was very impatient because I was trying to be picky. I hate it when he tends to be impatient. I want the best Vitamin C for me so we ended up having a bit of an argument again- boiling down to me – being brand obsessive and him – being a miser. I really don’t like it when he becomes strict with money – considering it’s about health!

But then again he helped me a lot with household chores and all, so I’d forgotten all about before bedtime.

I so want to be Healthy!  Weather has been very weird here in Dubai. Since March it’s been drizzling every morning and a bit of harsh rain at night. It never happened before. I mean I know I’m the only sick person here I know. Three people in my car lift have heavy cough. But – I’m worried about having this colds for days… People got better eventually. I have to – too!

I will be having my medical in few days time as a requirement for my new job. I need to be clean and clear!

I’m up for green living if it’s all what it takes to be fit!

To health and happiness! ✰

 And btw, Sam’s buying me a small room heater which is really cool.

Beyond Human Eye

Well, big and small random stuff happened lately. I don’t even know where to start. All I know is that all of a sudden the idea of Sam taking photography in a serious (I’m changing my entire career and start fresh) kind of way- has been our target this March. He had been very depressed with his job and I guess me – landing in this new firm has pressed his issues more to the very core. I wanted to be consoling- sure. But I also have issues on me making all the efforts and shouldering the outcome of whatever future awaits us. I know he’s doing the best he can but I wanted him to try harder. Is that so bad?

He seemed very delighted with this brand new idea of venturing on creative freelance so I let him. Although I believe in great possibilities (well I also believe in rainbows and unicorn shit), I still think this will just help him  vent out if not unplug his creative force (which is good)- BUT I highly doubt this new mind blowing idea – will make us rich.

Although I have to admit this was my idea.

Originally, I really wanted him to take driving lessons to get a license. As far as I know, 80% of sales executives get better opportunities and huge compensation just by acquiring a license. Employers require them to drive around UAE. Bottom line is he doesn’t want to. Good. So how can we afford a dream house, traveling around the world and all that- let’s not even get started with kids, let’s just plan on getting a cat. How?? If I’m here starting off my career by being an executive secretary – expected to make coffee to guests and solve all office problems with a salary that doesn’t even allow me to get a credit card or a cheque book, then I hope he can explain to me how we can sort it all out getting somewhere near that WONDERFUL FUTURE we’ve been drooling about.

I am sounding ungrateful again, I know. I hope it gets better on the coming days. Things are still clear as blue skies and as fresh as Spring. Sam and I are by far in good standing now that we were able to have a few savings in our account. I can’t be all complaining.

I just hope… he gets more motivated to do something SOLID. I just hope he just leaves whatever baggage he carries right now, forget about all the backward thoughts and negative self talk. Just move along and take BIG STEPS.

My very famous photographer friend Dee said, that in order to capture a phenomenal shot, you need to see beyond human eye and surprise people. Make them see the ordinary in a most absurd, breathtaking, wondrous way.  Make them say, “Is that the same building I’ve been looking at by my window for ten years? It looks… spectacular! Wow them. Make them stare. Make them jealous. Unleash their desires. Make them taste beauty to its finest.

I need to encourage Sam more I guess. Shut my nagging complaining mouth up. He needs to see himself in a different angle and maybe then he can surprise people in the most astounding way. He has huge self-doubt and that bothers me a lot. He hasn’t been exposed to either corporate or creative world. I really don’t know where he’s been before me. But it looked like he’d been…out somewhere.

Sam can do this. I need to have faith in him so he can have faith in himself. He just needs to want it badly for all his magic to come together.

Old couples said that we’re always half empty and whatever is lacking from our partners, we need to fill in. We must die a little for love. I can’t promise anything. But I will give my best shot.

One Lonely Strawberry

So when the doorbell rang in the office this morning, I was surprised to find an elegant sparkling red ceramic vase with flowers, red balloons and a huge paper bag clasped carefully by a very enthusiastic delivery guy. I know it’s too cheesy to base your real life in movies but when it present itself before you fresh and all dolled up, wouldn’t you at once get dazed feeling like Katherine Heigl and Meg Ryan (in old days)?

Sadly, it’s not for me. It’s for our very pregnant Sr. Media Specialist who at that time was having lunch with the rest of the ladies. We were all wowed and we all aaaww-ed for the romantic gesture.

So when the second door bell rang, we just all burst out laughing unable to hide the inside joke that does not have to be mentioned to be understood. Ladies know what that joke is.

It goes something like... “Duh, as if I’m expecting a surprise delivery…”

We all do want that. Don’t we? We are pretty much designed the same way. Roses. Tulips. Box of chocolates. Strawberries. Balloons. Whatever it is that says, I remembered you. You are special. I spent a little extra for this you know. I went an extra mile to see you happy…

Ms. A gave me a piece of her strawberry chocolates and it tastes like heaven!
Well, at least I got a taste of someone’s happy valentines. Right?

It’s never too late though to daydream…

Advance Happy Valentines everyone! Stay Happy!

Too Many Thoughts, Too Little Time

I know. It’s been decades in my timeline since I posted something about my whereabouts.

Schedule has gone berserk and my thoughts have been running wild on different things.

What have I been doing? Where have I been? What magic has unfolded so far, lately?

I nailed a job in this amazing advertising company – which is really cool for a start, considering I have always wanted to work in media or anything close.

It was awesome. The thought of it is. But the fact that I have to start of course from the most bottom of the hierarchy without any promises of advancement could be a little bit of a drag. I mean… I told Sam before my first day kicks off, that I don’t mind serving coffee to my boss if I have to. This to some extent worked for the first few days until my fantasy of The Devil Wears Prada diminished.

I am not twenty two anymore. Come on. But then again, whatever ego I have inside has become irrelevant now knowing that on a bigger context, I got the job I wanted with better compensation and I got that chance (no matter how elusive it may seem right now) to win a more sophisticated and gratifying post in the days to come. (I don’t want to say future. Days sound better. Right?)

I have no reason to not be grateful. I have come a long way. 🦄

How to Love

I’ve been pretty distracted lately with overlapping marvels puffing out of my gray days.

I am lifting up all my gratitude above.

I guess this is life trying to tickle me because finally – I know what I want now and I want the best of it. All of it.

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Once in a while I’d stare blankly at the upper deck steel bed  above me and I’d wonder when this homesickness will ever subside. It’s been two years but I still feel like I’m just having a really long vacation from home. It still feels like my clothes and the very few items I bought for myself still belong to my luggage. It still feels like I just recently checked in and I still have yet to discover new things. It still feels like I have not established a career – if not a life here. It still feels like I am still wandering… lost…and left…wondering.

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When my sister launches an opening line that goes  “Can we skype?” – the alarm signals in my brain goes wailing and I immediately put my defenses mode on.  Exaggeratedly – true. We don’t normally skype about celebratory topics like “Hey sis I got a new job!” (See. She still doesn’t know that I really got a new Job. Yey!) or “Hey sis I met the Duke of Edinburgh today!” (She really did meet the Duke and shared a few puns with him) or “Your niece received the Margaret Quinn-Fish Cup for being at the top of her class!” (This is really BIG for us because her only daughter has just recovered from and was completely healed of leukemia.) or “I just got engaged!” (I don’t remember calling her for this.)

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